You do everything you can to be an amazing parent, but nobody’s perfect. No matter how sensitive, attuned, and attentive you are, you and your child are bound to have some misunderstandings. Given that you are a human being, you might even make mistakes in your parenting. These moments are formally called “misattunements” (we call […]
A Mix-Up, Fix-Up Model for Reconnecting with Your Child “Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.” – OSCAR WILDE
Bowlby, J. (1969). Attachment and loss: Volume 1. New York, NY: Basic Books.
When you return from being away, have a plan before you walk through the door: • Finish all calls and texts so that you can be fully engaged when you see your child. • Take a few minutes to wind down before you walk in the door. For example, stroll around the block or sit […]
You now have a routine for saying good-bye to your child. It’s equally important to establish a routine for when you return. “Hello” is more than a simple greeting. By taking the time to slow down, you and your child can reconnect and acknowledge each other’s presence in a meaningful way. Remember that, during this […]
A Routine to Connect “If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.” – PAULO COELHO
Bowlby, J. (1969). Attachment and loss: Volume 1. New York, NY: Basic Books. Center on the Developing Child at Harvard University. (n.d.). Key concepts: Brain architecture. Retrieved from http://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/brain-architecture/ Kaplan, L.J. (1978). Oneness and separateness: From infant to individual. New York, NY: Simon & Schuster. Kopp, C. B. (1982, March). Antecedents of self-regulation: A developmental […]
• Designate a special place in your house, like your child’s room, where you can focus on each other for a few minutes before you say goodbye. • Give your child a heads-up. Sit at eye level, look into her eyes, and calmly tell her, “Mommy will be leaving in five minutes.” (Hold up five […]
Like Charlie Brown’s best friend Linus and his blue security blanket, children often find comfort in the familiar, soft touch of a lovie or cuddly toy. These items are called transitional objects. People of all ages use transitional objects, ranging from students taking their stuffed animal to college to adults with heirlooms that have special […]
You may be tempted to sneak out and avoid a scene, but that only tends to make your child more anxious. You can ease separations that are painful for both of you by establishing a consistent way to say goodbye, much as you might have already done to ease the stress of bedtime. The repetition […]
